Outdoor String Lights in the Living Room
My mom walked into my living room in February, took one look at the ceiling, and said, “Are those the lights from the porch?” Not a question, really. More like…
Not Every Light Belongs Near the Shower
Everybody’s got an opinion about bathroom lighting, and the opinion is almost always the same one: it’s complicated, it’s dangerous, don’t touch it, call someone. I spent years believing that…
Battery Lights Outside: A Weather Reality Check
I own eleven sets of battery powered string lights. I counted them for this piece, on purpose, and then immediately regretted counting, because eleven is not a number a rational…
Signs on Light Poles: Who Actually Owns the Pole?
I was standing on the corner of my own street with a roll of packing tape and a stack of flyers for a lost cat that was, as it turned…
Bathroom Lights and the Ratings Nobody Reads
I own eleven light fixtures that have, at some point, lived in a bathroom. Eleven. I counted them for this and then sat on my bathroom floor for a genuinely…
Wall Sconces in a Bathroom Without Regrets
My mom walked into my bathroom in Baltimore, flicked on the sconce beside the mirror, looked at herself for a solid four seconds, and said, “well, that’s rude.” I asked…
A Chandelier in the Living Room
I put a chandelier in my first condo before I owned a single piece of real furniture, which tells you everything about my priorities and also nothing about my judgment,…
Wardrobe Spotlight on Resale Apps: Worth a Try?
My mom looked at my phone over my shoulder while I was mid scroll and said, “Wait, you’re paying them to sell your own stuff?” She said it the way…
Sizing a Lampshade by Eye and by Ruler
I got my first lampshade rule from a laminated card that came free with a lamp base I bought at a yard sale in Pawtucket for eight dollars. The card…
Where I Would Shop for Table Lamps
I was standing in my living room at eleven at night, barefoot on the rug, holding a lamp up against the wall like I was trying to guess its weight.…